quarta-feira, 4 de março de 2009

But this was really goodbye.

Maybe a foolish or too romantic way to say that I'm leaving, but what I said it's definitive, either way. I just wanted to justify myself to myself. I wanted to show myself that leaving was the only choice that I've already made.

I don't want to talk about it either. The whole meaning of that post was just my idea of closure. A complete closure. I really don't wanna go back to what we were, sincerely. Maybe it wasn't very clear in the last post. But what I wanted to say was: I may still like you, but I'm leaving, because I'm not truly sorry for your absence. That's it, you know? I'm not trying anything, I'm not trying to haress you or anything. Maybe I was trying to make it more beautiful than it really is, but that's how I am, that's what brings meaning to my life. Sorry if that hurt you. I didn't mean that.

Have a nice life too. And, please, don't answer this. You weren't supposed to have answered the last post in the first place. I didn't expect to 'draw' your attention, I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry things couldn't be different.

Goodbye.

3 comentários:

gilly disse...
Este comentário foi removido pelo autor.
gilly disse...

I know I shouldn't say anything, but I can't contain myself. Anyway, don't be mad at me - this is my last comment.

I am dying. I am fucking dying. I can't feel it. I can't feel your abstence too, but it is because I'm dying, not because you don't worth it. What you really don't worth is this message, that will only bring you the certain that you were right, and you'll become way more spoiled than you already are. I'm fucking laughing now, haha. You are so spoiled! You always want everything! Break ups are not beautiful! WE are not beautiful! Your life don't even have a meaning bigger than painting a black & white photo just to say that you made art. You are so ridiculous. I know it was a goodbye. You think I'm begging for you to come back, or that I trully believe it was your way of calling me? I know what you are doing. And it is a lie.

If I still could, i'd be loving you now with my whole heart right now. I hope I am and just don't know yet. I CARE about you. I can't feel. I'm dying. WHEN are you going to see that you are dying too?


Stay alive, you fat stupid girl that I love so much and don't want to see ever again, only if I end up fit.

gilly disse...

http://www.foundmagazine.com/find/941